What really frustrates me is not being able to fix things. Not things like hinges or cupboards, but people. I have spent almost 9 years so far as a student learning how to recognize, diagnose, manage, and treat the medical conditions that people suffer from, and still at the end of the day, these problems sometimes are still not fixed. This has never been so evident than the times I have spent in developing countries. Today has been no different. Malnourished women lying in beds all around me wasting away with AIDS and what can I do. There is nothing here to give them. No treatment. Nothing to relieve their suffering. I feel helpless and wondering if what I have, what I know, is it enough? Can I really speak a word of hope? Can I show love that they will understand? Do I have the ability to make a difference?
A student bent over listening to heart sounds of a women who is in her last stages of active AIDS, wondering what to do. The lady reaches up to stroke the head and hair of the student. The student is overwhelmed thinking that she was there doing her best to show love and this woman was loving her back. So grateful merely that these nurses just “showed up”.
This is really it. Sharing hope by showing up. And when I don’t feel qualified I am reminded that…
“ I am being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you”
Where my strength and ability end, God can finally begin. When I run out of skill, God in his infinite wisdom can work. When I have nothing to give, God can pour out his immeasurable mercies. I am overwhelmed at the incredible God who loves me.
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